Today's readers are savvy, lazy and a li'l bit kerrrazy! Okay, rhyming was yesterday. My point: if you want to compete with the Wiis, XBs and PS3s (can't stop), you have to stay on top of YOUR game, playa! Let's break it down. Phreh-phreh-phresssh!
SAVVY: People expect you to use words. But words they don't know? Or better, don't exist? Neologisms and obscure idioms make your writing seem smarter. That makes you seem smarter. And THAT is perfectly cromulent.
LAZY: Who has time to read whole words anymore? Save time and look cool by using apostrophes and contractions whenever and wherever you can. Just look at the success of words like Li'l Abner, Li'l Jinx and Lil' Kim. Rockin'!
KERRRAZY: See how I flagrantly misspelled the word "crazy"? Whatever - like I care. Flouting linguistic convention is as rebellious as it sounds. Try things like adding the letter 'z' to the end of words or even superfluous letters - i.e. apostropheeez! Screw you dictionary - I don't play by your rulez!
posted by Paul Phelps at 8:04 PM
2 Comments:
What the hell is your problem with this? You're making a lot of sumpthin' outta nuthin'.
This post embiggens (embiggenz?) us all.
Sigh. I wish I still had the energy to post anything other than photos or stuff cribbed from Gawker.
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